The Word on the Street

“The summer looks out from her brazen tower,
Through the flashing bars of July.” – Francis Thompson




“If people destroy something replaceable made by mankind, they are called vandals; if they destroy something irreplaceable made by God, they are called developers.” – Joseph Wood Krutch

 

 “Without music, life would be a mistake.” – Friedrich Nietzsche






 “I know God will not give me anything I can’t handle. I just wish that He didn’t trust me so much.” – Mother Teresa

“Never has there been a good war or a bad peace.” – Benjamin Franklin

“Believe and act as if it were impossible to fail.” – Charles F. Kettering

“Just become quiet, still, and solitary, and the world will offer itself to you to be unmasked; it has no choice. It will roll in ecstasy at your feet.” – Dana Hawksister

“Without love, life would be a mistake.” – Cindia Carrere

“Feeling gratitude and not expressing it is like wrapping a present and not giving it.” – William Arthur Ward

“Laugh as much as you breathe and love as long as you live.” – Author Unknown

“The big question is whether you are going to be able to say a hearty yes to your adventure.” – Joseph Campbell

“Just as your car runs more smoothly and requires less energy to go faster and farther when the wheels are in perfect alignment, you perform better when your thoughts, feelings, emotions, goals, and values are in balance.” – Brian Tracy

Communal well-being is central to human life.” – Cat Stevens

“If you’re going to be thinking, you may as well think big.” – The Donald

“Alone we can do so little; together we can do so much.” – Helen Keller

“Lenin could listen so intently that he exhausted the speaker.” – Isaiah Berlin

“The Lord loveth a cheerful giver. He also accepteth from a grouch.” – Catherine Hall

Signs, Signs, Everywhere a Sign

The calories from the Halloween candy haven’t even been burned off yet and already there are Christmas decorations in the market place. Thanksgiving turkeys are still nibbling grass, blissfully unaware of their annual star status on the food chain. In other words, we are at the starting line of the holidaze, but we’re just getting warmed up, or cooled off in terms of weather.

‘Tis the season of dressing in layers, stoking fires, sipping tea, kicking leaves, planning parties, and donning our gay apparel, but the frenzy is still a few weeks away, so for this quiet lull between trick or treating and cranberry sauce, we thought we’d display a few signs from our travels.

The fog and storm images are self-explanatory and rather Novemberish, but the rest might require a little narration.

We’ve noticed that stores in other countries have a certain charm to their names. Perhaps tourists from other countries are also enchanted by what we name our shops. Yes, I imagine the lyrical sounds of K-Mart, Bi-Mart, and Walmart inspire much poetry and picture taking. On that subject, I just heard a great line, “If I keel over in Walmart, drag my body to Niemans!”

Who knows what “Mimi la Sardine” in Paris sells, or what could be found at “Funky Fish” in Naflion, but if it turned the contents of one’s stomach, beware of ever throwing paper down any toilet in Greece. “Twould be a faux pas of major proportions.

However, the soothing pepto bismal pinkness of the next three shops should sooth any upset tummy. “Piiiiiiiink…”

Mona and her enigmatic smile have fascinated peasant and nobility alike for over 500 years, so it should not come as any surprise that La Gioconda still woos the customers, whether she is hawking a sidewalk café in the City of Light, promoting “The Groovy Store” in The Peloponnese, giving out free pumpkin fudge samples in California, or representing Humboldt Carpet.

Speaking of celebrity endorsements, there are many ways to achieve Point Relax. In this sign, apparently Buddah is suggesting a cocktail. I’m getting mixed messages from Monsieur Van Gogh though. In one hand, he’s holding up a bottle of Absinthe, but he seems to be shaking his head back and forth in a dazed confusion. Does he want us to try the green fairy or is he warning us off her nasty sting?

Another way to achieve Point Relax is through retail therapy or, gasp! How did that sign get there? Honest Mom, it’s just a traffic sign, I had no idea.

Any helpful narration has come to an end, for the next few remain mysterious and they found their way into our cameras because of their baffling nature.

I’m super confused by NeOVADIAL. What’s it supposed to do? I mean, the poor woman is obviously in bad shape. She’s wearing some sort of brace or corset on her neck, and her hair stylist appears to have been in the throes of PMS or on an Absinthe trip gone awry. Come on, look at those butchered bangs and the gap of skin peeking out from her scalp above her ear. The cream cooked up in the Vichy Laboratoires has not eliminated the woman’s crow’s feet, yet she’s staring complacently as if she’s had a few of those Buddah cocktails.

As an aside, please remember that you can enlarge any of the photos by clicking on the images and then hitting the back arrow to return to the blog. For details, it helps muchly. I insert this handy dandy public service announcement here, so you can be sure to read the fine print at the bottom of the next one…

What? Persians for sale? Can we do that now? Again, confused. Are they new older Persians, or are they older new Persians? Regardless of their age they have been “examined by U.S. Customs and Border Patrol.” At least that’s what the green tape says. Attention attention - No more red tape, everybody’s going green.

Avast and ahoy, the head exams are free. Is this part of a kinder, gentler bureaucracy, the new health care plan, or a courtesy we now offer foreign tourists, otherwise known as homey land hospitality?

In New York hangs a sign with the words, “Fur and Furgery.” Oh, pray tell, what does that mean?! Perhaps I should give one of the Wanks a call and ask. Really, if you’re a wank, you’d hang out a shingle and advertise? Well, maybe the honesty’s refreshing. “Hello, Babe, I’m a wank, give me a call sometime.”

Ai yai yi. It’s all Greek to me. Anywho, see ya at Point Relax.

Seeing Signs

Phew! The weather report on Saturday called for rain, but the collective mood of the artisans and patrons alike kept the wet clouds at bay and we sighed with relief as the sun came out to play, long enough for us to take note of these signs.

In the early morning, a “homeless” man stopped by our booth to rant. He showed me photos of his apartment, talked about his $700.00 bicycle and continued to spew resentment that the economy has been affecting his begging business.

After listening for quite awhile, I found the magic wand to make him disappear. I asked him point blank, that since he wanted everybody to give him money, what was he willing to give them in exchange? A smile, a kind word, a blessing? He, ahem, suddenly had to go.

Eugene is a quirky place. Admittedly, sometimes I have felt “stuck” here, but that was B.C. (before camera), and now I’m discovering my bliss, my heaven.

I don’t exactly want to say that Eugene is white bread, but pulling straight from the City of Eugene Recreation catalogue, there is an “Ethnic Excursion” planned. Any guesses what it could be? Lunch at a Thai restaurant, housed in the former International House of Pancakes. Oh, my sides are hurting I’m laughing so hard. And wait, there’s more. Here is a direct quote from the description, “After lunch, a mystery stop around town is usually planned.” Mystery stop? Usually planned? Boy, sign me up.

NOTE: When Groom proofread this, he came to the “Ethnic Excursion” paragraph and choked. He exclaimed, “This can’t be true, nobody is going to believe you!” I whipped out the catalogue and pointed to the lower left-hand side of page 52. We both had a second fit of laughter.

Through his tears, he rationalized the mystery stop and why it is usually planned. “The driver has to roam around downtown in the tour bus until he spots somebody that could pass as a ‘person of ethnicity.’”

We were cracking ourselves up. Then I said, “That explains why that bus full of people were honking and waving at me and taking snapshots the other day. Is that why they’re called honkies?”

If Eugene is spread on the white bread side of life, its edges can get a little moldy. These rough edges that used to poke at my raw nerves have become fuel for inspiration.

You may not be able to partake of the “ethnic lunch excursion,” but we can proceed with a mystery stop or two around town.

We purposely walked down 13th to photograph Antrican’s hand-painted mural, and I am ashamed to admit I didn’t know it had been “accidentally” painted over two years ago. What? Where have I been?

I don’t think the signs would be as interesting if every photograph were taken from the same angle, say straight on and centered. That’s why a few of these well-known landmarks are only partially on view. For those of you who live here, you’ll know straight away where everything belongs, but for those of you who reside elsewhere, I guess that’s the “mystery” part of this tour.

P.S. We are looking forward to having our own website, The Language of Light, completed. The photos in this blog format are often cropped in strange places and/or squished together in odd ways after posting. The finished result looks very different than what we see beforehand and we are trying not to be too disappointed. Click on the photo to enlarge and use the back button on your browser to return to this page.